FYI: This blog is being taken care of by Sister Martin's mom Sharon Martin - She is posting emails and pictures that I am sending to her each week.

Monday, 3 March 2014

Beatboxing....BBC style, writing raps and sick....ness!

Sick again! Yay! My companion and I have been locked in our prison (some call it a house) for 5 days! We broke out long enough to send you this letter.....I'll type fast before the surgeon discovers I'm gone and comes after me with a chainsaw ;)

I'm sick. I'm crazy. Example 1:
Sister McD is obsessed with Pride and Prejudice (or really ANYTHING to do with Jane Austen). Luckily I'm also a sucker for unrealistic, sappy, classic English love stories, so I was just as happy as she was when her sister sent us the soundtrack from the BBC version of Pride and Prejudice. She has had it on repeat for a couple of days (we are desperate for new music in our house, so we latched right onto the CD when it came). Anyone who knows me well will appreciate this: suddenly I snapped back into reality (I was daydreaming and just sitting on the couch like a sick, unresponsive vegetable), I caught myself beatboxing to the CD. Seriously. I was BEATBOXING, to classical music. #alltimelow (Do they do hashtags anymore?? Probably not! Oh well!). Sister McD had to accept a long time ago that she has an absolutely ridiculous trainer, so sadly enough, my beatboxing did not even phase her!

I'm sick. I'm crazy. Example 2:
A few of our members have been absolutely ace this week! Helping us out loads! Bringing us goods to keep us sane! We decided it was about time we made a thank you card for one of our families who is absolutely brilliant!!

Now a normal person does the following: Picks out a nice card. Writes a lovely message of gratitude and best wishes for all their good-doing, seals the envelope and calls it good.

Me?: I decided to make a handmade card. And write a thank-you the form of a rap....that's set to the tune of the Fresh Prince of Bel-air rap. #legit.......Seriously? Does anyone do these things anymore! I would be happy if they didn't! I always thought they were dumb! Now I only use them because they are the only thing left on my planet that makes me feel relevant, up-to-date and somewhat "normal"......ok, lets be real (#realtalk? #hashtag??), Sister Martin and normal never went together!

Prepare your minds to be BLOWN!! Here is the rap I wrote out:

This is a card all about how
Our life got flipped, turned upside down
We'll only take a minute just sit right there
We'll tell you how we became the sisters of this county Cumbri-air

In West Canadia born and raised
That's where Sista Martin spent most of her days
Chilling out, HEALTHY and happy until
The motherland germs got her real ill

When a couple of Scots, they were up to some good
Started doing service in our neighbourhood
They got us all of the goods that this sick sisters needs
Now we're rapping to praise you for all your goods deeds

We're grateful for our friends with mad mormon swag
And kindness so legit, we holla "service hashtag"
We pray for loads of blessings to come for the care
You're giving to the homies in Cumbri-air

You have saved all our butts as you've taken our stress
We thank you again: Yo Burrows, you da best!
We love you so much, and we're so glad you're here
To help us preach love, in the county Cumbri-air!!

Take that Hallmark!!!! Can't touch this!! :P

My inner child was envious this week:

5 words!: Scooby Doo Ice Cream Van!

There was an ice-cream van in the middle of the dodgiest neighbourhood ever, that looked EXACTLY like the mystery machine! It even had the mystery machine written on it. Its music was even less annoying then the other ice-cream trucks here! Us-- being the calm, collected, refined, sophisticated sister missionaries that we are-- frantically chased after the van and begged and pleaded to take a picture with it! SUCCESS! Pictures attached :)

I found the cure to awkward missionary conference phone calls:
Anyone who has served a mission knows how painful conference calls (with zones and/or districts) can be. Waiting 12 hours for all the different companionships to get added to the conference call. This morning I realized a great solution! Just play classical music off your ipod in the background! Sounds just like elevator music! I have converted our district to elevator music as we wait for our zone phone calls to get rolling! Good laughs and soooo soothing!

President Preston's bad joke of the week!:
I LOVE our mission president because he tells jokes that are JUST as bad as mine!!!

"I need some help with spelling! Are any of you good spellers? I am struggling with the word Armageddon........but then again, if I can't spell it, it isn't the end of the world, is it?"

BOOM DOOM CHINCK (drums and symbols anyone?!)

We have Cheesies in our house. They are called Wotsits here. That is a hilarious name! "Where are those Wotsit call them?!"
The end. No further comment!

Best Family Home Evening Idea Ever:
I really probably shouldn't condone this activity whilst I'm a missionary, but it gave me a solid chuckle! Our recent convert family told us about a recent FHE they did. They watched episodes of Friends, and counted how many times a commandement was broken (or was implied to be broken) in each episode! Hilarious! I will definitely be giving this a try for some laughs when I go home (that is...if I ever get brave enough to watch tv this rate I'm going to be mucho awkward RM when I come home!!)

Brits Like Beverages:
Ok, so I already knew this before! But this was confirmed BIG time this week! Apparently people here say if you're sick, it's good to drink lots of Ribena (brand of black current juice). We were out so we asked a member to pick up some. OH BOY did they pick up some. They brought a 2 LITRE bottle of Ribena. That's double the size of our milk! CRAZY!!!! Having not grown up drinking much juice, I don't know what to do with myself at the moment! Safe to say, Sister McD-- my favourite, beverage guzzling Brit--is loving life at the moment!!

You know your members love you loads whennnnn................
We got a phone call a few nights ago. It was a member. Her young boy starting bawling his eyes out after his swimming lessons. She was frustrated that she didn't know what was wrong with him. He apparently wailed out "I WANT TO TALK THE SISTERS". She couldn't get him to calm down, so she rung us on our mobile. Bless him. He had a bad experience during his lessons (the deep end is scary when you're young and small). He wanted to talk to us though...not his mum. After we finished talking to him and calmed him down and she had the phone again, we were all laughing so hard. She put it best: "Most kids cry for their mummy when they're upset.....NOPE, not my kid! He cries for the sister missionaries!"

Celebrate good the train station?!
At the Preston Temple

One of our elders had a birthday last week! We all went to the temple on Tuesday and had a longgggg, tiring day of travelling home. We were all stuck in the station waiting for our train, when the elder opened up his b-day package and kindly starting handing out some cupcakes to share. What else are a bunch of missionaries going to do in the middle of a busy, cold train station? Stick a candle on it, get a random person to use their lighter to light it up, and sing Happy Birthday with no shame!....And that we did! Good times! We have the best district ever!!

How desperate am I to recover on a scale of 1- onion?

I have heard some awfully strange remedies in these last 5 days! The weirdest? Our elders SWEAR that if you dice up onions, put them in your socks, and sleep with them on, that you'll be cured! They have been harassing me for days now to do it! I almost contemplated doing it last night (desperation at its best). Let's just say, I'm praying HARD that I'll be healed before I have to sink so low as to try something so revolting! PRAY FOR HEALTH PLEASEEEE! I don't want to stink of onions!

The End! That is my week! The weather is gorgeous here! So that is a blessing! There are so many blessings around us! Go look for some this week! I'll continue to enjoy receiving missionary jokes (or really any cheesey jokes that'll make me laugh), as a birthday present to me!!! Hopefully next time I write, I will be virus free and overstuffed with delicious birthday cake!! :)

Love you all!
Hope the time goes quickly for you and slowly for me!
XxX Sister Martin

PS! HALFWAY THERE Y'ALL! I'm home in 9 months! :) :(

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